Approaching Women Is Like Riding A Motorcycle

In the summer of 2021, I plunked down a few thousand dollars on a lightly used Yamaha SR400.

The bike was only 5 years old, a 2016, with fewer than 3,000 miles on the clock.

Despite being manufactured during the Trump administration, the bike has the recognizable classic styling of Japanese motorcycles in the 1970s: elegant in its simplicity.

From the moment I got the little pistol, I’ve loved it.

I live in northern Utah, a location rich with jaw dropping scenery: winding canyons, fiery red desert, and rushing rivers.

One of the most beautiful countries in the world, the United States, is even more breathtaking to behold, astride a motorcycle.

Simple errands that would be boring in the comfortable air conditioning of my Honda Accord… like hitting the gym, returning library books, or picking up vitamins,…become an adventure when I ride instead of drive.

Riding my bike is not only fun, it’s exhilarating, challenging at times, and is also just cool.

Wrapped in my armored jacket, leather gloves, and reflective helmet, I feel like the badass hero in a futuristic action adventure film.

Even when I’m riding to Barnes and Noble to get a nerdy philosophy book, or something equally mild mannered and tame, on my bike, I look edgy and dangerous.

Though riding is one of my favorite hobbies, I would hate to have a motorcycle as my only available mode of transportation.

A motorcycle is amazing… when everything lines up perfectly.

When the weather is clear:

not raining buckets,

not whipping 60 mph winds,

and not blizzarding piles of snow,

(all common weather conditions in Utah),

riding my bone shaker is a source of pure pleasure.

When I don’t have to carry the week’s worth of provisions home from the grocery, or transport my dog to a vet appointment, or drive a few friends to the movies on a Saturday night, the sleek two wheeler is perfect.

As many of you already know, professionally, I’m self employed as a Licensed General Contractor.

As much as I love my bike, it’s a nightmare to even imagine arriving at my job sites with lumber, tools, and sheets of drywall precariously strapped to the handlebars of a motorcycle.

Luckily, I also own a car, for skiing, and trips with the dog, as well as a work van, that gets loaded with the building materials, ladders, and power tools I need to make my living.

I don’t drive the bulky, slow, utility van for fun, and I don’t try to fit 3 friends on a motorcycle to hang out on weekends.

Like the tools I use in my work, everything has it’s own use.

The point I’m making here, is that riding a motorcycle is a passion I truly enjoy.

I encourage men to take a safety training course, buy a bike, and get riding yourself, if you’re interested.

The rush of adrenaline that comes from twisting back the throttle, feeling the engine roar, and the wind rush, is as powerful as injecting an illicit drug.

As much as I love the bike… it isn’t always the best tool for the job.

There are many more instances when a bike is impractical, inefficient, or would be incredibly frustrating, if it was the only weapon in my arsenal.

What Does This Have To Do With Anything?

As I’ve written about before, recently I restarted my old hobby of approaching women.

I got back into the game via a weekend pickup artist boot camp with one of the legends of the craft, RSD Tyler, aka Owen Cook.

Read about my experience with the RSD boot camp in “Top 5 Paradigm Shifts I Learned From RSD Infield Boot Camp With Owen Cook”.

While the weekend reinvigorated my love of meeting people, we all know that “cold approach” techniques have an abysmally low rate of ending in dates or sex.

For more on this, read my post, “Any Woman You Want?”

Approaching is valuable for its ancillary benefits: increased social freedom, boosting confidence, creating a sense of abundance, enjoying being present life in to the moment.

While it can be fun for its own sake, cold approach and day game are inefficient ways to actually get laid, if that’s the result a man is after.

I simply enjoy seeing an attractive woman in a store, or on the street, and feeling the rush of excitement that comes from striding up to her with a confident, “Hey! You look interesting, I thought I’d come say hello" (or whatever).

My commitment to myself, for the next 90 days, is to approach every attractive woman, or interesting looking person, I see… no matter where I am, or what I’m doing.

If I like a person’s unique style, see them wearing a watch or t-shirt I like, want to meet their dog- anything… I approach.

The fun is from challenging myself, and, if the person is a woman I’m attracted to, feeling the butterflies in my stomach as I walk up, tingling with the uncertainty of not knowing what’s going to happen next…

If the object of my interest is game, I start a conversation.

The art of creating a connection, out of nowhere, while standing on a busy street, or aisle of a bookstore, demands my full attention.

In that moment, I’m locked in on every minute aspect of the interaction.

The rest of the world fades away as I get swallowed in the moment.

I feel alive in the same way that I feel when piloting my motorcycle on through winding canyon roads.

In an approach, every decision is important: my body language, vocal tonality, eye contact,… are a matter of “life or death”, success or failure, to the budding relationship.

A successful approach feels like threading the eye of a needle.

I project an air of being slightly cocky, but not obnoxiously arrogant.

I’m funny, but not acting like a court jester.

I’m curious in my new friend, but not completely won over.

At its best, the delicate dance is thrilling.

However, as much as I enjoy it, I wouldn’t want random approaches to be the only way I meet women for dates and sex.

The fact that I don’t need it to “work”, is what makes it fun.

Just like a motorcycle is enjoyable because I don’t need to use it for every errand or task in my life.

Liberated from the pressure of desperately NEEDING to get laid, I can enjoy cold approach like a surfer who loves the rush of riding a wave, or a skiier who feels more alive when he’s racing down the slopes.

It’s fun for fun’s sake, enjoying the pleasure of being alive.

When I approach a sexy woman, my first objective is to see if she’s a good candidate to spend more time together.

Just because a woman is attractive, doesn’t mean she’s pleasant to talk to, available, or interested in me. (Most aren’t.)

However, if she is available, I invite her to hang out on the spot, an “insta-date”, in PUA lingo.

If not, we trade contacts via Instagram, and I seed the next meeting with an invitation to a cool event.

Lately, I’m having more success inviting women to activities I’m already doing anyway: DJs, parties, new restaurants, etc.

In my opinion, the traditional “date”, as in, “Meet me for drinks at 7” is a relic of the pre-social media era.

Women have a lot of options.

Asking an attractive young woman to commit an evening to just talking to you, at the Olive Garden, is asking for rejection, or a flake.

It’s better to invite her, along with several other friends and girls, to a night out as a group.

If you invite two male buddies, and 4 girls, even if two girls flake, and one shows up late, you still get to have fun with your friends, and the one girl that does show.

Read my post, “Stop Taking Women On Dates”.

Additionally, inviting women to trendy, cool events that you attend with friends, is a better way to demonstrate your social value, and show off your lifestyle, than sitting at a Starbucks talking about your desk jobs.

A Tool For Every Task

I have many different types of ways to meet women.

I play soccer in a co-ed team, with several cute, sporty girls.

I do Latin dance, meeting lots of women of many different backgrounds, ages, and flavors.

I chat up women in stores, parks, and malls.

And, if you’re familiar with my work, you know that I participate in transactional relationships with women, seeing sugar babies and escorts.

Like a Swiss Army knife of sex and dating, I have a tool for every job.

If I meet a sexy woman through approaching, I’m confident that I know exactly how to invite her out, build comfort, create attraction, and guide the interaction to a passionate seduction.

When my approaches are fruitless (statistically much more likely), I can hang out with women I know socially, or leverage my hard work and success on more of a “sure thing”, with the exact type of woman I’m most attracted to.

This final strategy is more popular than ever, leading me to create a new business, helping successful men navigate the world of transactional relationships, at SimpleSugarDating.com.

In my new business, my clients range from hard-charging entrepreneurs, to e-commerce wizards, and tech guys.

Like me, they all realize that life is short, and the only reason to spend time earning money, is be able to enjoy it on the things you want.

It’s a timeless adage, but myself, and other men in my position are finding it to be true:

“It ain’t tricking if you got it”

And if it is “tricking”, who cares.

I love the rush of meeting new women, but the reality of “game” is:

attractive women have an unfathomable amount of options,

women can be flaky as the weather,

I don’t want to spend my life crossing my fingers and praying that a capricious, fickle woman will “like me for me” enough to decide that I can have sex that night.

Conclusion

Choosing how he will interact with women is one of the most important decisions any man will make in his life.

Currently, I’m focusing on creating a meaningful life for myself, one that helps others, is full of adventure and fun, and, of course, many beautiful women.

If you are interested in learning more about the world of transactional relationships (although all relationships are transactional), look me up at SimpleSugarDating.com.

-Solitary Beast