F*ck Like Gronk: How Confidence, Humility, & Fun = Pussy
One of my favorite new bloggers, Millennial Bachelor (millennialbachelor.com), recently dropped an excellent, well timed post titled, “The Diminishing Returns of Knowledge When It Comes to Game”.
In the post, he made the observation that lots of guys can “ramble off theories, talk about why women do what they do, are psyche experts”.
However, he noted that guys like, “very rarely, if ever, get laid all that much”.
I can admit that this is something I’ve experienced first hand.
I’ve spent hours online watching Red Pill videos, and in forums debating game strategies, when I should have been out approaching and interacting with women.
In my defense, it’s currently the dead of winter in northern Utah.
Below freezing temperatures will make you question your motivation to just be out trudging through snow, approaching heavily bundled up women.
Millennial Bachelor continues.
He talks about the irony that most men who are REALLY successful with women, know hardly nothing about game and seduction theories.
Men who are most effortlessly successful with women spend their time crushing it: in the gym, at work, in sports, and social groups. They chase success, and women come with that, as a natural byproduct.
“Imagine someone with the demeanor of Rob Gronkowski”,
he writes,
“that’s the kind of guy who probably gets laid a lot.”
I needed to hear that.
If you’re reading a blog about being a loner, you probably need to hear this too.
Rob Gronkowski is a professional football player, known just as much for his outstanding performances on the field, as his infectiously likable, party boy persona.
Besides being good looking, wealthy, successful, and famous, he has a winning personality that charms and attracts everyone.
He always seems to be having an AWESOME time.
A little research into Gronkowski’s backstory proved Millennial Bachelor’s point.
When Gronk was playing at the University of Arizona, he lived with 3 of his 4 brothers in a frat house environment they called “Club G”.
There were wild times with super soaker fights, and indoor slip and slide, and of course, tons of women.
Gronkowki received 65 scholarship offers, yet chose to play across the country from his home state of New York, at a school with a lackluster football legacy.
When his dad asked why he chose University of Arizona over legendary gridiron institutions like Ohio State, he famously quipped,
“Dad, if you’ve ever been to a pool party at Arizona, you’d understand.”
The more I researched Gronkowski, the more I liked his public persona, and the more impactful MB’s point became.
I identified a handful of characteristics that make the lovable, future Hall of Famer so successful with women, and people in general.
I’ll explore them further here:
1. Confident
Gronkowski has an easy smile and laid back demeanor that communicates calm, completely self-assured confidence.
The more I study social dynamics, body language, and power, the more I realize that real self-confidence is quiet.
Gronkowski is talked about as a legendary tailback that “redefined” the position with his lethal combination of speed and bone crushing power.
The way he stands and speaks communicates his confidence, which is admirable among men, and attractive to women. He seems completely comfortable with himself in every situation, with an easy laugh and open body language.
2. Dominant in his field, but not arrogant
Gronkowski is a three time Super Bowl champion that has played on the most dominant team in the modern era, yet he never talks about his accomplishments.
He’s a guaranteed first ballot Hall of Fame player, and national celebrity, yet in interviews, he seems approachable and humble.
This feeds directly into the previous point on confidence. Gronkowski is so good at his job, he doesn’t have to brag or boast. He’s widely regarded as the best to ever play his position. His record breaking performances speak for themselves. As universally likable as he is, he would never be a household name without his ability to blow up defenses and score crucial touchdowns.
Whatever your chosen profession, strive to be the best. First for yourself; understanding that massive success attracts attention from beautiful women and high value male friends as well.
3. Fun/ Mischievous
Gronk’s public persona is playful and silly. He’s always having fun, and always the life of the party.
His energy is infectious, and draws people (especially women) to him.
I feel most men undervalue how important emotions are to women. Influencer Kevin Samuels speaks often about women as “sensual creatures”.
He says, “Women live in their emotions. A woman will buy a new handbag or pair of shoes, eat ice cream or chocolate, anything to make themselves feel better.”
A man who is able to spike emotional response of fun and adventure in women will find himself being chased by them, as they chase the emotional high of being with him.
4. Genuine
From interviews I watched, 6’6 Grokowski comes across like a boyish gentle giant.
He’s soft spoken. He laughs often. He’s earnest.
He never comes across as a braggadocios famous, multi-millionaire, though with his 7 figure endorsements, and Hall of Fame NFL career, he could be forgiven if he did.
His character is gentle and kind. This is likely the result of coming from a loving, supportive family. He had a tough but loving father figure, and a kind, doting mother. This is a huge advantage.
Life, and relating to people, seems to be much easier for people who were lucky enough to come from secure family backgrounds.
For those of us who didn’t, the answer is to invest time and energy into learning about your inner wounds, and coming up with ways to heal.
It’s not your fault, but it is your responsibility.
It’s a privilege to be able to transform the way you think, feel, and relate to the world.
5. Jacked AF
Gronkowski is listed as 6’6, 258 lbs, with hands nearly 11 inches wide from thumb to outstretched pinkie. He’s a giant.
Even a year into early retirement, he’s maintained the chiseled physique of an athlete: visible abs, wide shoulders, and muscular arms.
Nothing beats the confidence and well of emotional well being that comes from truly feeling good about your body. Beyond the surface vanity of looking good, keeping fit makes you physically healthier, less susceptible to injury, cancer, and diabetes, more energetic, and more mentally acute.
6. Plays Dumb
Gronkowski seems to play up the “dumb jock” stereotype. He plays this role so well, you’d never guess he graduated high school with a 3.75 GPA and over 1500 on the SAT, back when 1600 was a perfect score.
This principle is incorporated into several of Robert Greene’s 48 Laws of Power. The lesson here is to let other people feel smarter than you. No one likes a know it all.
One way I use “playing dumb” is to encourage women to talk more, so I can sit back and listen. Author Corey Wayne writes that, on dates, “A woman should be doing 70- 80% of the talking”.
I push it even further and always let the woman talk 90% of the time.
The more she talks, the more I learn about her, and what she wants.
The more I understand my date, the better I can read her, and the less chance I have of talking her out of liking me by sharing my polarizing opinions.
On dates, and even in conversation in general, I “play dumb” by asking lots of questions:
“What do you mean?”
“Why do you feel that way?”
“What do you think?”.
People love talking about themselves, their opinions, and their experiences.
Let them.
“You can make more friends in two months of being interested in other people than you can in two years of trying to get other people interested in you.”
-Dale Carnegie
Play dumb. Ask questions.
Let people feel superior by letting them explain things to you.
This technique works to increase your rapport and likeability instantly.
In Conclusion
All of this stuff is based on the trend of Game 2.0, which focuses on actually becoming a high value man, rather than faking it with canned lines and tricks like “peacocking”.
Some of these recommendations are not going to work for everyone, or will need to be adapted depending on your age, personality, etc.
For example, I’m currently in my late 30s. The overgrown frat boy image would look silly on me. I’m a grown man. My maturity and confidence are the greatest strengths of this era of my life. Read my post “30 Mindset Shifts for Men In Their 30s”.
The takeaway for me is to infuse boyish, playful humor into my interactions with everyone, not just women.
Everyone loves to laugh.
In the right moment, a funny comment and a mischievous smirk is perfect for winning friends and influencing people.