How to Break Free From the Red Pill Rabbit Hole
Hi again,
Hope you enjoyed my previous email, a look at how binging bitter Red Pill content could be destroying your social and sex life:
by making you seem weird, angry, and offensive to people who don’t spend hours absorbing Manosphere content (most people).
This week, I’m back again with a look at HOW I did it.
When I realized that my favorite Youtubers, podcasters, and internet personalities were tanking my sex life, I knew I had to cut WAY BACK on my consumption.
But how??
I’d spent most of my waking hours listening to Coach Greg Adams, Better Bachelor, and others- for years.
Red Pill podcasts and streams were the soundtrack to motorcycle rides, long hikes, and gym sessions since I discovered the genre in 2017.
Additionally, as someone who doesn’t have many friends, I’d developed para-social relationships with my favorite creators.
I looked forward to new videos or podcast episodes, commented on their ideas, and donated to them via super chats and Patreon.
I wasn’t just consuming content, I was invested in the community, with both time and money.
RP content, like anything that provides juicy shots of dopamine, is highly addictive.
When I decided I needed to scale down my time in the Manosphere, I knew it wouldn’t be easy.
Breaking a habit isn’t easy, especially when it’s one you enjoy.
But I knew my fixation on the Red Pill was making me socially isolated and weird, which was causing me to feel lonely and insecure, and preventing me from connecting with people when I really wanted to.
I wanted to be able to connect with people, talking about subjects that helped me feel closer to them, instead of alienating others by repeating negative divorce and child support statistics like a broken record.
I wished I could share my natural humor, warmth, and interest in others, creating a friendship or romantic sparks, instead of feeling resentment or anger towards members of the opposite gender.
Any of that sound familiar?
If you’re looking for a way out of the Red Pill rabbit hole, follow these steps.
Read the source material
Every man should understand the basics of human nature. Understanding the evolutionary and psychological reasons behind people’s mating decisions is captivating, and useful. Once you understand why people do what they do, you can observe the dance with fascination. You’re also less likely to get manipulated or taken advantage of.
Most RP content is just repeating and rehashing subjects already covered (more throughly) in books.
Skip the middle man and get your information directly from the source.
Essential Red Pill reading includes the books in my article “3 Books to Massively Improve Your Dating and Sex Life”, along with: The Rational Male by Rollo Tomassi, Free Agent Lifestyle by Coach Greg Adams, and The Mystery Method, by legendary PUA “Mystery”.
2. Take A Break From Red Pill Content
Most RP content is rotting your brain and making you miserable.
Take a week off from focusing on “hypergamy” and see how much better you feel.
The energy in your body feels lighter, more vibrant, and more open when the weight of bitterness and resentment is lifted.
After a few days away from the cesspool that is most of that genre, when you try to go back to it, it feels off.
You get a glimpse at how nasty and offensive a lot of that content is, and how odious you must have seemed to others when you were consumed with it.
The 80/20 rule is not going to change, whether you watch 80 hours of videos about it every week, or not.
Go live your life!
> Sign into a different Youtube account
> Find new podcasts and videos about other hobbies & interests (Great chance to get some, or explore new ones)
> Make a plan for what you will do when you feel the urge to use RP content (Wait 10 minutes, do 30 push ups, write, play guitar, etc.)
3. Talk TO Women More Than Listen To Other People Talk ABOUT Women
Twenty minutes of speaking to an adult, human female will provide you more information about the “sexual marketplace”, and your station in it, than hours of outrage bait podcasts.
Most Red Pill gurus, even guys with hundreds of thousands of subscribers, who have written stacks of books, aren’t in relationships with attractive women anyway.
The ones that are single are just as frustrated as you are.
The ones that are married are committed to women who don’t look like anyone you’d bother to approach. They can’t help you and have nothing to teach you.
Women are just people.
They primarily make decisions in order to benefit themselves, just like you and I do.
If you, at any given time, happen to be the best decision in front of her, she’ll choose you (for the moment). When you’re not, she’ll leave. Just like you would do, if you had the infinite options of an average looking woman in the Tinder & Instagram era.
Base your sense of self worth on factors you can (mostly) control: being skilled at your chosen career, excelling in your passions, or GETTING some, if you don’t have any, and helping others.
You can do more than you think you can.
Thanks for reading,
Chance