Give Women Anxiety

If you have a functioning brain, you have noticed by now that many women seem to enjoy being miserable.

Whether in the form of true crime podcasts, drama in their girlfriend group, or abusive relationships with drug addicted men, the typical woman appears to be completely enthralled with the allure of negative emotional experiences.

Despite what they say, the typical woman often ignores good natured, agreeable men that can offer her commitment and a stable relationship. (Boring!)

She will leave that guy on read, or use him for attention and validation when the guy she actually likes is ignoring her. (Which is partially why she likes him)

Some women are more addicted to chaos than others, however, you will discover that even intelligent, educated, otherwise logical women will choose the temperamental, unemployed “bad boy”, or emotionally unavailable married man over a completely available suitor that offers love and reliability.

Finally

When women do finally choose the “boring” guy, it’s only after the handsome alcoholic has had his fun, and absconded.

When you talk to women about this delinquent, to your surprise, that despite the bad treatment, abuse, cheating, etc., she confesses that he left her.

The good news is, being a “boring” guy, is not a life sentence.

It has nothing to do with holding a stable job, excellent credit score, or your lack of active warrants.

You don’t have to quit your career, live in your car, or develop a cocaine habit, to be the exciting guy that thrills women.

You simply must understand how to employ the same erratic, unpredictable behavior that “bad boys” use, to excite her with the dopamine hits of uncertainty she craves.

Give women the gifts of uncertainty, angst, and insecurity, not just for your own selfish ends, but because SHE LIKES IT.

Even a mild mannered accountant can employ the strategies used by 35 year old DJ/ bartenders that get women obsessed and chasing their attention.

Let’s begin.

Your Time Must Be Scarce

Scarcity creates value.

This is true in precious metals, beachfront property, and blondes with big blue eyes and a natural D cup.

Whatever is easily obtained is cheap and undesirable.

The same must be true of your time.

Have a life outside of work and the time that you spend with a woman.

The woman NEEDS to feel that your time and attention are premium resources that she must compete to be worthy of.

The entirety of pickup and dating advice is summarized in that single sentence.

Options for this include:

Other women,

Projects such as working on a podcast, Youtube channel, or book,

Career advancement, for example a degree, licensing/ certification in your field,

Interests, especially masculine coded, i.e., motorcycles, weight training, martial arts.

The Importance of Friends

As women are highly social creatures, ideally, you would ideally be doing at least some of these pursuits with friends.

The title of this blog was originally “Solitary Beast”.

I’m naturally a self-motivated person who is often very happy to pursue my hobbies alone.

This is totally natural, especially for men.

That said, I’m telling you that women will think it’s weird and low value if you don’t have at least a few friends to go hiking, grab a beer, or call up for a game of pickup basketball.

The value of social connections in your life is multi-layered.

First, it meets your basic human need to be known and understood, which is there, even if you would like to pretend it isn’t.

Second, relating to other human beings is a skillset.

Growing your capacity to build, and maintain, relationships of all kinds only makes you better in romantic and sexual interactions.

Third, relationships expand. As you make friends, you’ll make more friends. Some of those friends will turn into drinking or gaming buddies, business contacts, introduce you to other women, some will even become lifelong compatriots.

Join a rec league team, start going to an MMA gym, or start accepting invitations to weekend cookouts from your co-workers.

Keep Her Guessing

Corey Wayne and his book, “How to Be A 3% Man” changed my life. I’ve been unabashedly open about the effectiveness of 95% of what he teaches, writing about it in my post “3 Books to Massively Improve Your Dating & Sex Life”.

A common refrain in his books and podcasts is the statement, “Scientific studies show that women are MORE attracted to men who’s feelings are unclear”.

This has nothing to do with belonging to a street gang in Baltimore for a few years in your mid 20s.

Just be mysterious, unpredictable, and a little vague, about your interest in women.

Even if you are convinced she is your dream girl, keep those thoughts to yourself.

Take the time to get to know the woman, in various circumstances, such as when she feels frustrated, angry, jealous, and so on.

There is a delicate balance between being reserved about your emotions toward her, and being a cold, unfeeling jerk.

You will probably get this wrong a few times before you’re able to dial it in.

Basically, just don’t go overboard in expressing your interest and attraction.

Keep compliments genuine, yet minimum.

Give her the impression that you are taking your time to get to know her before forming an opinion.

You can even say this if it comes up, for example, she asks, “Where is this going?” or “What are you looking for?”

The proper response to this, that will excite and intrigue her, is something like, “…well, we’re still just getting to know each other”.

Texting

You will want to vary the amount, and frequency of your texting and phone communication with women. (This is straight out of Corey Wayne’s material, which he also heavily copied from the late Doc Love),

Humans feel exhilarated by intermittent rewards, such as gambling and games of chance.

If she texts you, respond in immediately, within 10- 15 minutes sometimes, if you’re available.

In other instances, wait an hour or two.

If you’re really Machiavellian, occasionally wait multiple hours, or even a full day, or more before replying.

Sidenote:

You should actually BE busy.

Adopt a philosophy of continuous improvement. Become obsessed with imaging your life as a legacy, a work of art. Once you have a magnificent obsession, even if it’s something like mastering your fly fishing cast, this becomes dead easy.

Train for a marathon, overhaul your resume to apply for higher paying jobs, be gone all weekend fishing or skiing with the friends I mentioned previously.

Back to intermittent rewards- sometimes she will receive her shot of dopamine, via a text from you, right away, sometimes she will have to agonize for hours, wondering where you are, who you are with, if you really like her, or if you’ve met someone younger or prettier.

This will only INCREASE her interest and attraction for you.

Game Playing

Misinformed men will try to dismiss this as “game playing”.

Bitter, middle aged women will call it “manipulative”. (Ask them what type of men they dated when they were young and hot, though).

I’m not here to label this simple strategy as anything but “effective”.

If you doubt me, try quickly responding to every text or call from a woman you are dating, like an attention starved puppy, wanting for the smallest scrap of approval.

See if you last even two weeks before registering a noticeable lack of interest from the woman in question, until she confesses that she has changed her mind about dating and sleeping with you.

Actually, she will divulge, you are more “like a brother” to her. In fact, she now sees you as “just a friend”.

Other Women

Until you are in a committed relationship with a woman, if that’s your goal, you should be actively meeting and seeing other women.

Flirt with the barista, the waitress, the front desk girl at the gym.

Take their numbers, ask them out, meet up for coffee, drinks, etc.

In fact, from the position of a man who is ALREADY getting laid regularly, you are now a magnet for other available women.

Women have evolved to have a sixth sense for when they’re in the presence of a man who is successful with women.

I would go so far as to say being pre-selected, which is having other women attracted to you, is the single most attractive quality any man can possess.

Despite what the red pill gurus tout, women date broke, short, or “ugly” men all the time.

Guys (who don’t understand female attraction) scratch their heads they see a beautiful woman with a poorly dressed, balding “loser”, wondering “…Why is she with him?”

Little do they know that the balding guy is the head bartender at a trendy downtown lounge, or, even better, he owns it.

Similarly, he might be popular in a scene she’s involved in, like theater, snowboarding, or underwater basket weaving. (As an aside, becoming prominent in any social setting involving women is a nearly foolproof way to meet more women, even getting them to approach you.)

He might even be her boss, or her professor in graduate school.

Women are sexually attracted to a lot more qualities than just looks, and very beautiful women tend to care the least about a man’s appearance, in my experience.

They care a lot more about status, access to a fun lifestyle (not just having money), and what other people, especially other women, think about a man.

Conclusion

To go from “boring” guy who gets ignored or friend zoned, to an attractive man who has multiple women blowing up your phone, is more about your behavior, than your abs, your haircut, or your car. (Although there’s no excuse not to kill it in every category. It’s your life, why not?)

Once you’re not fat, and have a decent haircut, the next thing to raise your attractiveness is to understand how to get women emotionally addicted to you.

Accomplish this by being an exciting mystery to women.

Make her compete for your time with your job, your friends, your running routine, your weekly soccer game with your boys.

(Get some friends if you don’t have any).

Vary your communication speed, and frequency, and the amount that you see her in person.

For example ,text her several times a day on Thursday, then leave her on read the whole weekend.

See her twice a week one week, then only once the following week, then go distant and skip a week after that.

Let her find other women’s phone numbers, hair ties, panties, and earrings in your bathroom.

Be ungovernable.

Make her chase you.

She’ll only fall deeper in love.

-Chance